Dear Travel Channel and Food Network,
First let me say that I am an avid viewer of many of your series, including Man v. Food, Bizarre Foods, No Reservations, Diners Drive-ins & Dives, and numerous other programs. I think you’re doing a bang-up job. However, if I see one more show about barbeque restaurants, barbeque cook-offs, or barbeque cooking in general, I will be forced to throw my boyfriend’s television out of our living room window.
I am absolutely sick of hearing about BBQ. I don’t care about the many variations of North Carolina BBQ sauce (vinegar base v. ketchup base), or the dry rub method favored in Kentucky, or the pit beef of Baltimore. I refuse to sit and watch another stocky, overall-clad Southerner talk about how important it is to cook the meat “low and slow” and then boast about how he smokes his pork for 36 hours straight until it “falls right off the bone”—at which point, the host will pull the bone clean out of the pork, hold it up to the camera, then indulge in a piece of meat and gush over how tender and delicious it is.
I never, ever want to see another shot of brisket being sliced (what I refer to as “the money shot”). I never want to watch the pitmaster slather on another coat of BBQ sauce with one of those disgusting sauce mops. I’ve pretty much seen enough BBQ B-roll footage to last me the rest of my life. Also, on your various restaurant shows, please do not feature any more old-timey BBQ warehouse joints that serve their meat (alongside a few slices of Wonder bread) on butcher paper.
I GET IT.
There has to be some other cuisine to which you can dedicate hours and hours of programming. I urge you to find one.