Dear Girl Who Tried (and failed) to Bag My Groceries,
You are an idiot. First of all, I use the self-check out line just to avoid people like you. The store was quiet, there was no one behind me, I was in the zone. And you couldn’t leave well enough alone. Never mind the fact that you snuck up on me and had already filled two plastic bags before I was able to tell you that I had reusable bags. The part that really got to me was after you finished up and I had to pull my cart over to the side and spend 10 minutes reorganizing every single bag. Luckily, I was only about 10 feet away from you, so I hope you saw me.
I don’t get you people. When you’re putting items in plastic bags, you’ll double bag a box of crackers and a can of tuna and finish the job with no less than 30 bags. But when I bring in my reusable bags, you’ll just cram everything together. That is what you did to me. I was thrilled to find my cold cuts on the bottom of one bag, crushed. You also crushed all of my leafy greens and just threw my ground beef into a random bag (I think it was in the same bag as the pineapple. You know, the spiky fruit that could have pierced the wrapper and gotten ground beef all over the contents of the bag?). What is the matter with you????? Didn’t they teach you anything when you started your stupid job? Basically, didn’t they tell you to do the opposite of what you did to me?
I so wanted to go up to you and say something, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I will tell you, though—you were the last straw. Now, whenever I go to Stop & Shop and someone tries to bag my groceries, I’m going to have to yell, “No! I’d like to bag my groceries myself, please!” I can imagine how well that’s going to go over. Are you happy? You’ve turned me into “that girl.”
Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I absolutely despise you, and you better hope that I never see you around the S&S again. Also, I hope you like it there at the grocery store, because that’s as far as you’re going to get in life.